Coyoacán is known for its many coffee shops and the hippie intellectualism that supposedly lurks there. Indeed, if there is a place in Mexico City where you are most likely to see a young person hunched over a battered copy of Las Venas Abiertas de America Latina or arguing with a group of dreadlocked friends about whether the PRD can ever truly be a radical party, it is probably in one of the dozens of coffee shops within a few blocks from the Plaza Hidalgo.

One of the most popular coffee venues is El Jarocho, which has several locations clustered in the center of Coyoacán. Although it’s hardly an undiscoverd gem, El Jarocho has become a favorite of mine, not so much for the coffee they serve (which is quite good), but for their frozen chocolate. This treat, which comes served in a styrofoam cup, captures the essence of chocolate caliente, complete with tiny flecks of cinnamon floating around, but in a form that is a cross between a milkshake and a cup of nieve.

Their coffee is strong and good; it has a bit of a following. Although there is no indoor seating at their location on the corner of Allende and Cuauhtémoc, it’s not uncommon to see lines stretching down the block, waiting to order at the counter. Other locations are a bit more relaxed, with benches and plastic chairs partially blocking the foot traffic on less-busy streets.

I have taken to heading to El Jarocho after having tortas at La Barraca Valenciana; there is a location right next door, on Avenida Mexico between Malintzin and Xicotencatl. I always go for the chocolate frío, but there are other frozen drinks, a surprisingly large selection of caffeinated and decaffeinated teas, as well as rich-smelling cups of Veracruz-style espresso drinks. The pan dulce is nothing to write home about, but as a vehicle for the coffee, you could do a lot worse. They also sell coffee to brew at home.

El Jarocho; www.cafeeljarocho.com.mx/; locations throughout Coyoacán

It is in this spirit that I mention the Maison Française de Thé, a semi-subterranean tea-lounge located in the heart of the Colonia Roma. Although there is nothing explicitly lesbian about this establishment, to me, the decor, which features low settees and various exotic/”primative” accents, has a certain 1920′s Rive Gauche feel that allows you to pretend that you and your macha friends are having a Natalie Barney-inspired salon.

Tea snobs afficionados can buy fancy tea in bulk in the front of the store, or you can order a pot of one of the dozens of blends they have available. I swear that they used to offer a blend called the “Colette” (which I once unabashedled ordered by requesting a pot of “this lesbian tea” while pointing to my selection). It tasted exactly like the special tea from Paris that my grandmother serves to important guests. However, the last time I went I found no Colette on the menu. The closest semblance was a tea called “Paris Cheri,” and I recommend at least sniffing it if not ordering an entire pot to sip while you recline on a cushion and read some Djuna Barnes.

someone get this macha a cup of tea

Each pot contains about three generous tea-cups (and is priced accordingly) and is ideal for sharing between two people or enjoying slowly by yourself over the course of an hour. In addition to tea, they serve delicate finger foods and sweets.

If you enjoy looking at the shoes, calves, and fashionable skirts and pants of Colonia Roma hipsters, then the people-watching is ideal from the low windows of the Maison de Thé. Otherwise, I recommend this place for dedicated tea enthusiasts and anyone who wants to live their French lesbian salon fantasy while in Mexico City.

Maison Française de Thé: Caravanseraï; address: Orizaba 101-A, on the corner of Alvaro Obregon, Colonia Roma; phone: 5511-2877; e-mail: caravanseraimexico@yahoo.fr

In any case, some lesbian friends of mine accidentally introduced me to a great little café in Coyoacán that caters to those with specialized food needs. Formerly known as Basanti, Café-Patisserie “Ruta de la Seda” (“silk route”) opened in the spring of 2008 and claims to offer “organic flavors of the world.” While that might be a bit of a stretch (since only two or three continents were represented–one in the form of a plate of house-made samosas and accompanying mango lassi), I was impressed by what I saw on the menu and the few items we sampled while seated under the shade of large umbrellas in front of the cafe.

All of their baked goods are made from trigo integral (unbleached, whole grain flour) and many options are dairy free. In addition to containing no artificial flavors, colors, preservatives, or genetically modified ingredients, no animal fats are used in their doughs (only pure canola oil). All of their postres (38-40 pesos) are baked on the premises: the smell of fresh-baked almond cookies wafted out of the kitchen to where we were sitting outside, tempting our small group to order more than we already had.

Although not all of their products are organic (coffee being a major exception), all of their juices, fruits, vegetables, dairy-products, breads, and tortillas are certified as such.

There were an assortment of sandwiches and teas on the menu, but we stuck to coffee and dessert. They offer the standard upscale coffee choices, as well as some I had never seen, such as the delicious cubana style coffee, an espresso flavored delicately with caramelized sugar. All drinks could be made with soy milk, which is not something I have seen very often in Mexico City.

The menu warned us that not everything listed was always available, due to the seasonal nature of many of their ingredients, but I was still disappointed when the waitress told me that they weren’t offering the tarte tatin I had my eye on. She pointed out several alternatives, included one not on the menu, a dense and bittersweet chocolate cake (perhaps flourless…), served with dollops of blueberry puree and fresh blueberries on top.

I’m no connoisseur of pastries, but I must say, I was impressed by this cake. The generous slice was simple and rich, dense without being too dry. If the (no added sugar) blueberry puree was underwhelming, it was only in comparison to the intense flavor of the chocolate. Devouring it was a group effort.

What I liked most about this small café was that it had a refined, French atmosphere about it, despite its very Berkeley, hippie heart. The quality of the food and coffee we ordered was so high that I didn’t mind the peace-frog soap dish in the bathroom. Even with the organics, the prices were lower than many of the more touristy cafés in the center of Coyoacán. I suspect that some items on the menu are better than others, but it will be a pleasure to go back and sample more.

Ruta de la Seda is not a specifically lesbian establishment, but the waitress was pleased to tell us that they “don’t discriminate against anyone,” and I strongly recommend it to anyone looking for places off the beaten track in Coyoacán.

Café-Patisserie: Ruta de la Seda; located at the corner of Aurora and Pino in the Santa Catarina section of Coyoacán

But if you are someone who seeks a specific destination in your escape from the (often oppressive) bustle of Plaza Hidalgo and the Jardín Centenario, I recommend heading south down Calle Higuera for several blocks until you reach La Conchita, a small park centered around La Capilla de la Conchita, a tiny eighteenth century baroque chapel with moorish-inspired details.

balloon seller in La Conchita

The park itself is peaceful and has many benches, good for public necking, but there are some historical sights that make La Conchita worth strolling through. In addition to the Capilla de la Conchita, this plaza is home to the Casa Colorada, historic home of La Malinche (a.k.a. Malintzin to the Aztecs, and Doña Marina to the Spaniards), the mistress/native informant/baby mama of Cortés, symbolic mother of the mestizo, and fascinating historical and cultural figure. Hers is the red house on the corner of Higuera and Vallarta, but it is no longer open to the public.

If you stroll down to La Conchita to escape the bustle of Plaza Hidalgo and the Jardín Centenario (which, at this date, are undergoing major construction, threatening the livelihood of many vendors who usually set up shop there) and are looking for a place to grab a coffee, the Plaza Café, on the northern edge of the park, is not a bad choice.

In addition to hot and cold coffee drinks (between 14 and 30 pesos), you can also buy coffee grounds and beans here. Although I have never done so, the quality of the drinks I’ve ordered in house suggests that this might not be a bad place to come for a bag of freshly ground. Items which caught my eye on the menu (but which I have yet to sample) were the strudel and bisquets served with homemade fruit preserves. There are also many flavors of ice-cream and sorbet. For more savory options, under the section of the menu labeled “Para Matar el Hambre” (“Kill Your Hunger”) there are also empanadas and sandwiches served on bagels from 28 to 43 pesos.

The atmosphere of this cafe is open and relaxed; the music is not obnoxiously loud. It seems to draw a younger crowd (who linger near the front, perhaps just to hang out with the wait staff) as well as people in their thirties and forties enjoying a quiet place to have a coffee. I met an awesome transgender dyke there once, suggesting a pretty queer-friendly vibe among the staff, although not an explicitly lesbian or transgender establishment. The Plaza Café is a perfect place to seek refuge if you are caught in a summer rain while meandering in La Conchita.

Plaza Café; at the corner of Vallarta and Higuera on the northern edge of La Conchita

One of the things I love about the Centro Historico is the way the combination of the architecture, the fonts on the signs, and the styles in the storefronts allows you to time travel through decades, even centuries of Mexican history. Simply walking down Cinco de Mayo, from the majestic Palacio de Bellas Artes, past the 16th century decadence of the Casa de los Azulejos and the stylish lines of art deco buildings, all the way down to the Catedral Metropolitana, gives any visitor a sense of the way different eras seem to overlap and bleed into each other in this part of town.

My favorite place to stop for nourishment along Cinco de Mayo is La Pagoda. Formerly called “Cafe Popular,” La Pagoda has all the charm and attitude of a well-run roadside diner. The front part of the restaurant has row of booths for two or four, opposite a long counter. The counter is often full of single gentlemen stopping in for some comida corrida or a piece of pan dulce and some coffee, depending on the time of day. The back room is sunnier and has more booths and tables. The decor is an interesting blend of 1950′s and 1970′s hues and furniture, with small televisions propped in the corners of the ceiling, displaying an ever-rotating slide show of featured menu items.

The service is snappy and provided by sassy waitresses (of all ages) dressed in matching pink uniforms, complete with hair piece. Perhaps the reason the service is so good is that patrons are handed an evaluation card with the check. I’ve never had a reason to fill it out negatively, and usually have something positive to say about the service.

In my experiences, waitresses have never so much as raised an eyebrow upon seeing a large group of machas or an affectionate lesbian couple tucked in a booth. Additionally, I have seen transgender women dining here, without incident.

The menu offers a wide variety of styles of food, from sandwiches served on bagels, to soups (including ass decent sopa azteca), to egg dishes, to salads, to more standard Mexican fare. My favorite item on the menu is the chilaquiles verdes, with chicken, with an egg, or plain; all are delicious and filling. The portions are large and served with a generous amount of cheese. La Pagoda also offers well priced comida corrida during the day (around forty pesos). Nothing on the menu is over 100 pesos, and most items are under 50.

Aside from its savory fare, La Pagoda is well known for its pan dulce and delicious cafe con leche. For those that have never ordered cafe con leche in Mexico, the ritual of the experience is part of what makes it delicious. Dark, hot Espresso is poured first into a glass (you say how much), then topped off a minute later with hot, slightly sweet milk. The glass vessel allows you to witness the color of the beverage get lighter and lighter as the milk reaches the top of the glass. I will admit to not being a very sophisticated coffee drinker, but I love ordering this, and have done so at both 9:30 in the morning and 11:30 at night.

La Pagoda is open twenty-four hours a day, and is a wonderful place to stop for a reasonably priced and delicious meal or snack both during the day between sights in the Centro Historico and late at night in an attempt to prevent a hangover the next morning.

La Pagoda, address: Cinco de Mayo 52, Centro Historico, corner of Filomena

It is impossible to separate the history of this chain and what it represents to chilangos, since Sanborns can be found in each corner of the city. There are eighty branches throughout Mexico City and sixty more across the country. The advantage offered by these kind of stores, is that you can have the same recipes and the same quality; it doesn’t matter where you are in the Mexico. Since 1985, Sanborns has been owned by Grupo Carso, managed by Mexican billionaire Carlos Slim.

The importance of La Casa de los Azulejos is not only the legend of its creation, but the fact that it was the first place in which the Zapatista Army had chocolate and some pan dulce when they took over the city in 1914.

Because of this branch’s historical link to the Mexican Revolution, Sanborns has tried to link its aesthetics to those of the revolution: the waitresses at all locations of this restaurant have to wear an uncomfortable cardboard collar meant to emulate the clothes worn by mythic revolutionary folk hero Adelita.

Foto: ArtMageda

Sanborns sells imported magazines both in English and Spanish that you can flip through for free. You can also find overpriced cigarettes, toys, pharmacy products, fancy-pansy chocolates, cd’s and a useful ATM. It’s best feature is that you can always use the bathroom for free. Sanborns’ ubiquity in the city makes it a convenient spot to look for in a middle of an emergency.

The most recommendable Sanborns for machas visiting the DF, is the one located on the corner of Londres and Amberes in the Zona Rosa. The most interesting time to visit this place is weekends, before the sun rises, when the little café transforms into a diverse people-watching show, in which a wide array of partying characters can be seen. Young fags, punks, darketos (goths), dykes, femmes… all looking for a coffee and some carbohydrates to replace those burned during the night.

The uniformed waitresses attend to this diverse population with indifference—the kind needed to work the graveyard shift. Flirtatious glances are exchanged between tables, the vestiges of the night’s glamour not yet worn off. If you are lucky, maybe someone will ask for your phone number before breakfast…

I find that the architecture, signage, and fashion of the Centro Historico act almost like an erratic time machine, leaping decades and even centuries from block to block, or even storefront to storefront. El Moro is firmly lodged in the mid-twentieth century, with cafeteria style tables, beautiful tiled walls and columns, and smartly-uniformed waitresses.

The menu inside El Moro is simple enough: churros and four different types of chocolate (hot chocolate). Although I encourage enough visits to determine your own favorite, I enjoy the chocolate frances because it is slightly less sweet than the other choices. If by chance the mild temperatures in Mexico City should creep up to the point where hot chocolate is not applealing, El Moro also offers milkshakes served in classic, soda fountain glasses, as well as your usual bottled refrescos.

Do not expect anything complicated–there are no stuffed churros here. The churros are as they should be, crispy on the outside, soft on the inside. Most importantly, they are fried up moments before they are brought to your table, so each batch comes out slightly different from the last. You are welcome to watch the process as the churros are being made in a large vat of oil just to your right as you walk in.

For those without a sweet tooth, during the day there are street vendors set up in front selling tacos and tortas, which, perhaps because of their partnership with El Moro, are better than your standard street fare. You are welcome to bring your tray inside as long as you or someone in your group is also purchasing something in house.

El Moro is open 24 hours, making it an excellent place to attempt to prevent a hangover. There is nothing explicitly macha about El Moro–although I’ve always felt comfortable with lesbian P.D.A. there–it’s just a place not to miss on any trip to Mexico City. A paquete of churros and chocolate will run you just under 50 pesos.